Bones are not enough
by theweirdkidinthecorner
Summary: Ginny struggles with Anorexia, Bulimia, and an unrealistic goal of perfection. PG-13. If you are recovering from an eating disorder, I don't want to be the trigger. Please don't read if that is the case. Reviews are kindly accepted :-D
1. There is no such thing as perfect

Ginny rushed to her first class of the day in hopes of not being late again. She overslept, again. Well, she purposely overslept everyday because she wanted to miss breakfast. When she missed breakfast because she overslept no one asked questions, but if she went and did not eat then the questions just were thrown at her constantly. Well, this day was a good day, she made it to class right in time to hear Binns start his lecture on Goblin Wars....again.

Since no one took notes in Binns' class she started to make her daily plan. When she had finished with her plan is read:

"Height: 5'7"

Weight: 118.5 lbs.

Goal by tomorrow: 116

Goal food intake for today: -

Skip lunch-go to libray

Skip dinner-go to "sleep" early"

Yes, that would do. It did just fine everyday though. Although she never seemed to reach her goal weight, she kept persisting. It was something she would never achieve because there was not a low enough number to define perfection. Perfection was walking in the rain and not being hit by it. Perfection was walking in the snow and not leaving a footprint. Perfection was fading slowly into nothing...

After Binns class she had about one hour before lunch. This extra time was spent in her room. Standing in front of her mirror. She poked at the fat that wasn't there and critiqued every inch of her body.

"I am so huge. Look at the little, I mean huge, pouch of fat I have. This is so depressing, why do I look like this? Why can't I just be perfect naturally? Why am I so FAT?!"

After this Ginny ran to the restroom to do a task that came naturally. Ginny stuck her lean finger as far down her throat as it would go. She began to heave but nothing came up. Her body heaving but her throat still dry, Ginny sat in front of the toilet hoping to get rid of something. But nothing came up. No matter how hard she tried nothing would come up. This was because she had not eaten anything in three days. And it would have been longer, but freaking Harry saw her and said "You look pale Ginny, are you feeling well? Have some chocolate." This angry thought was the last one she had before she fell to the floor her arms still on the porcelain throne that consumed her life.


	2. The Evils of Food

_A/N: I do not own Harry Potter, etc. I am not J.K.R. I will continue this story even without reviews I guess. Thanks for anyone who reviews!! _

Ginny awoke with a start only five minutes later. She quickly looked around and it seemed like no one had come or gone since she passed out. She slowly stood up, being careful not to make herself feel worse. On instinct she checked the glistening bowl. Nothing. Nothing but her dignity.

She gingerly picked up her bag, hoping that it's weight wouldn't be too much on her. She felt weaker and weaker with every step. It was going to be a difficult day. "Maybe I can just get some coffee and sprint to the library before everyone arrives for lunch." Yes, that would work just fine. So with that Ginny wiped the mascara that trailed down her face (because whenever she tried to throw up her eyes watered) and left the bathroom.

Ginny entered the Great Hall on a mission. But when she opened the great double doors she was surprised to see it so full. She glanced at her watch – 12:05 – damn. She might have to actually sit through lunch. Wait, what was she talking about? She only had to do what she damn well pleased, not what made everyone else happy. With that thought in mind she made a beeline for the center of the Gryffindor table where the coffee pot resided.

Ginny set her things down and started to pour a steaming cup of coffee. As she finished adding several packets of fake sugar without calories or fat, naturally, she felt someone tap her shoulder. She turned around and saw her best friend staring at her with concerned eyes. "Ginny, come eat with us there is a seat between Harry and me that you could sit in," said Hermione.

Ginny sighed inwardly. Hermione knew that Ginny couldn't resist Harry, but Ginny was focused. Being thin was more important than Harry. Besides, when she became thin would be the only time Harry would notice her. "Well, maybe I'll come and sit down for a minute. I have _so _much homework to do." What? Why did she say that, what in the world had driven her to vocalize that idiotic sentence???

"Great!" answered Hermione with an accomplished smile.

With a small sigh Ginny lowered herself onto the bench between Harry and Hermione. She eyed the food on both of their plates. Harry had a salami, ham, and turkey sandwich, chips (crisps), some treacle fudge, and a serving of vegetables. Disgusting. Ginny had not eaten that much since...probably the end of year feast of her fourth year (it was now her fifth year). And Hermione was eating a serving of corn, mashed potatoes, and a piece of lasagna. Nauseating. What was wrong with everyone? Could they not see what they were doing? They were shoveling fat into their mouths every day. She was glad she was above that. She was broken suddenly from her thoughts.

"Ginny, would you like some pie, or a sandwich or something?" Harry asked innocently. He obviously had no idea.

"No, I'm sorry Harry, but I really have to run, I have an essay due for Professor Binns tomorrow, but silly me, I left it until today! I'll see you later!" Then Ginny dashed out of the Great Hall before Hermione could protest.

"How odd. I haven't seen her eat in a good while. I wonder how she is surviving," Hermione inquired. She looked to Harry for her answer.

"Eh, I think it's just a girl thing. You could probably do it if you need to Herm."

"Why would I need to or want to? It's ridiculous. Something is wrong with her Harry. Don't you see that? Or...do you think I'm being over-analytical again?"

"You're just reading into this too much Herm, it's no big deal, she'll be sitting with us again by dinner, I promise." Harry would make _sure _that Ginny would be eating with them that night.

Ginny ran all the way to the library and fast as she could. Maybe she could burn a few calories that way. When she arrived she went to her favorite chair and took a seat. She looked around for something to do. She had forgotten all about her coffee mug, she groaned. "Keep it down Weaslette some of us are trying to read," an all too familiar voice sneered at her.

Draco Malfoy. The last person she wanted to see. "What do you want Malfoy?"

"I just was hoping you would keep it down, and I was wondering why you weren't in the Great Hall with everyone else?"

"None of you business Malfoy, if you must know" she began to stutter, "I-I-I have an es-s-say due tomorrow."

"Tsk Tsk Weaslette. Such a bad liar. I can see right through the vacant expression. Avoiding someone...or rather something?"

Ginny felt a sharp pang in her stomach. She thought it was nervousness, but it may have hunger, she did not know nor did she care. "Shove it Malfoy, I don't care what you have to say. I don't know what you're talking about anyway."

"Well, at least one girl in this school has the right idea. Everyone gets so fat after they start here at Hogwarts. I'm glad at least one of you is doing something about it. I never saw you as having a _problem _Weaslette. Good job, and keep up the good work."

Ginny stared at him, mouth gaping. What was he talking about? Her, a problem? As if. She would show him.

Ginny entered the Great Hall with confidence that night. She knew Malfoy would be watching her. She flounced with extra sass when she passed by the Slytherin table. She then took a place right next to Harry and Hermione. She then daintily put veal, green beans, and pasta on her plate. It truthfully made her sick to look at. But it was something she had to do. She had to break off the three days she had spent expertly dodging food just to prove Malfoy wrong. She then filled up a large glass with green tea, which she knew was great for weight loss and speedy metabolism. She then ate and chatted confidently with other Gryffindors. She made great small talk about Quidditch, classes, and of course, Snape. When she finished Ginny excused herself to go study. After she exited the great hall she dashed as quickly as she could to the restroom.

Ginny threw herself into a stall and slammed the door. She hastily locked it and went to business. She once again stuck a lean finger down her throat. This time she got the results she desired. She was re-visiting her dinner and she could certainly say it didn't taste better the second time around. Actually, it sort of did. It only tasted better because she knew she was purifying her body of fat and all of those unnecessary calories. She purged two more times, just so she could get out everything she could. She then popped a mint in her mouth, wiped her eyes and flushed the toilet. She then pranced out of the bathroom and into the Gryffindor common room where she threw down her bags. Ginny then ran to her room before anyone could see her to weigh herself.

"Come on...come on," Ginny said. The scale instantly responded. 118. Only half a pound?! Well, what could she expect? She ate all of that disgusting food...only to prove stupid _Malfoy _wrong. Ugh. She would never be perfect. She then went back downstairs to make her last journal entry of the day.

"Weight: 118 lbs.

Food intake- Veal. Green Beans. Pasta.

Purged-3 times.

Goal for tomorrow: 116 lbs."

Ginny sighed inwardly. This was going nowhere. She would have to try harder to accomplish her goal. She put her journal in her bag and heaved it onto her shoulder when she heard – "Ginny?"

"Yes Harry?" Ginny whispered with excitement in her voice.

"Good night and sweet dreams."

"You too Harry, you too." It hurt her inside. She wanted to say that with her arms around him. It would never happen. Not when she was fat she wasn't going to get him. She then went upstairs and put her things down by her bed. She put on flannel pajama pants and a thick cotton hoodie, even though it was only October. She then pulled her multiple comforters and blankets on for warmth. She just could not stay warm anymore.

Oh well, anything for perfection.


	3. Things are looking up?

_A/n: I'm obviously not J.K.R. This is my idea though, no characters are mine. Thanks for the reviews. There will be comments for those we reviewed at the bottom. I'm also _very _sorry for the lack of updates. I have been very busy with my acting, exams, school, and everything else that's been thrown my way. I'm sorry guys I'll try to be better about it!_

Ginny woke up and wondered why it was so frigid. She was used to it though, it always seemed to be so cold…all the time. She groggily threw back the covers, and then regretted it, too cold. She begrudgingly got out of bed and made her way to the bathroom. She checked to make sure no one was watching her. No one was, it was Saturday, everyone was outside or in the Library (well, the more studious students). She sucked in, held her breath, and stepped gingerly on the scale. _117 lbs. _Ugh. This is not what she wanted; there was still too much imperfection, ugly, hideous fat, covering her lovely bones. _I'm not going to get _anywhere _if I keep eating like a beast. _ She sighed and retreated to her room. She picked up her journal and began writing.

_Weight-117 lbs._

_Goal-Eat nothing today. Drink green tea (heavily infused with lemon)_

_Tommorrow-115 lbs._

_Homework-Ha._

Ginny grabbed a pair of blue jeans, a sweater, a scarf, and a jacket and hastily threw them on. She looked at her watch. _12:30_. Good, she had already missed breakfast _and _lunch. There was no explaining or lying to do, she had honestly just slept in. Ginny aimlessly meandered down Hogwarts' long corridors. Unfortunately for Ginny, she was weak. Her foot caught on the carpet and she tripped onto the floor. Ginny looked around her, but no one was there, thank God. She tried to get up but she knew that she would have to just sit there until her dizziness passed. But unfortunately, once again, someone walked by, the last person she wanted to see(well, aside from Draco Malfoy).

"Ginny! Are you alright? Why are you on the floor?" said Harry. Harry extended his hand to Ginny and helped her stand up.

"Thanks Harry, I just tripped over the carpet. It's not so bad on the floor though," Ginny said coyly.

Harry just laughed at her statement. "Um, listen since we have the day off do you want to go to the lake? Or the Quidditch field? Or wherever?"

Maybe Ginny did want to see him. Was she believing her ears? Before she realized what she was saying… "Well, what about Ron and Hermione?" Ginny then silently cursed herself for the statement.

"Oh, well I don't know where they are. I lost them earlier. Probably off studying," Harry innocently answered.

Ginny suppressed her giggles. She knew good and well that Ron and Hermione were behind the Quidditch shed. She had seen them go there many a time, but they knew it would upset Harry so they kept it from him. "Yah, that must be where they are. Well, I know a good place to go."

"Alright, just lead me there and we can hang out."

"Well, follow me Harry." Ginny did not know _what _she was thinking. Taking Harry to her secret place? Uh, she knew what she was thinking. Ginny led Harry towards Hagrid's hut.

"Hey, are we going to visit Hagrid or something," Harry asked and sounded slightly disappointed.

"No, no it's behind Hagrid's." Ginny tried to calm her breathing as they entered her secret haven.

The grassy field was hidden by beautiful trees with hanging branches. There was a quaint pond that had a mother duck and her babies lounging quietly on the surface. There was a little stone bench with flowers on either side. It was Ginny's heaven. She loved it.

"Wow," Harry breathed. It was amazing, and beautiful. How come he did not know about it before? It was almost too good to be true. Then he looked to his right and saw Ginny, it _was _too good to be true.

"We can sit on the bench if you want Harry. But I like this patch of grass here, it comfortable and has never stained my clothes," she said pointing to a nice worn area.

"That looks great," said Harry as he sat down next to Ginny. "So Ginny, have you enjoyed this schoolyear so far?"

Ginny could only think about two things at that point. His green eyes and how awful the year had been. "No, this year has been awful," she blurted out. She regretted it immediately.

"Why, what has been so bad about it Gin?"

He had called her Gin. Wow. "Well, um, you know. The work has been hard and the O.W.L. s coming up and all…" Ginny lied.

"Ah, yah, but I promise it gets better. Fifth year was not that bad…well the schoolwork wasn't anyway," Harry said in a sullen, low voice.

Ginny was flooded with guilt. How could she think about how dreadful things were for her? Harry had the worst fifth year imaginable. Bless him. "Yah…" Ginny said quietly.

"Ginny…what's up?"

"Huh, oh nothing Harry, what about you?"

His tone changed to a harder one and he said "Ginny, that's not what I meant. Something has been off about you lately."

Ginny was panicking inside but was determind to stay cool outside. "Oh, nothing, I've been feeling a bit sick lately and all. The work tends to take a toll on me. It takes away my color, at times my outgoingness, and my appetite." Oops, she had _not _meant to throw the last bit in there.

"Oh, that explains a lot. I was a bit worried. You don't seem to eat a lot, but it makes sense now. I won't force anymore chocolate on you, I don't want you to get sick," Harry said with a smile.

"Oh, that's okay," Ginny giggled. She looked down at her fingers…gosh they certainly seemed chunky for fingers. Then she shook her head and looked up at Harry. The look in his eyes was one she would never forget. That is because it was the moment directly before the infamous Harry Potter leaned in to her and kissed her. Man. It was perfect. He wasn't forceful about it. He didn't just stick his tongue in her mouth as Dean had. He just lightly kissed her but lingered for a moment before pulling away and saying…

"I'm sorry Ginny. I should not have done that!"

"Why not?"

"Ron would kill me if he found out. Please don't tell him."

"I'm not _that _thick Harry," Ginny said. Although she felt thick, well in the body she did. "Why does it matter what Ron thinks? If _I _approve that should be all that matters."

"I guess so."

Wow, he was so beautiful. Ginny just gazed into his eyes, they were such a mystery and she wanted to look behind them into what he was thinking. She stood up momentarily to brush off her jeans and regretted it. The last thing she heard was duck before she fell.

_Thanks guys!_

_Mysilentscream-_Thanks for the review! I'm very glad that it appears that I know what I'm writing about. No, I do not have an e.d. but I have problems with food sometimes. I'll try to be more constant with updates!

_Kina Potizma- _Thanks! I'm planning to keep going!

_HermioneBallerina-_ Thanks! I had already checked out your fic before you asked, lol. It's great, keep it up!

_Felecia_- Thanks! I'm glad it's interesting and I plan to continue on it!

_Aurora-Arielle_- Thanks! I had not even thought about the reason for her problem. So thanks for the comment, that will make the story a lot better I hope. I'm going to keep writing and I _will _introduce the reason! Thanks!


	4. Hospital Dilemmas

_A/N: I'm not J.K.R. and I don't own the characters…as Elaine would say "yadda yadda yadda…"(_Seinfeld

_Comment to a new reviewer at the bottom! _

_Also, I'm making this up as I go; I have no clue where it's going. I work better that way._

Harry jumped up to catch the falling Ginny. He barely made it in time to catch her head as her body landed. It was a good thing too; her head was directing itself to a rather unpleasant looking stone. _Oh God…what do I do? Is she dying? _ Harry checked her pulse and found that she was in fact not dying. She was still alive, fortunately, but her pulse seemed sluggish. Harry had always learned not to touch a person if they were unconscious, but that knowledge seemed ridiculous at this time. He picked her up deliberately and made sure not to jar her. Then he started his journey back to the castle.

"Thanks for bringing Ginny up here mate," Ron gratefully said to his friend.

"No problem Ron, I would be a git if I didn't do anything about her, since she was unconscious and all," Harry answered.

"It is a good thing you were with her Harry," said Hermione. "Goodness knows what would have happened if she was alone."

Ginny began to stir at this point and was collecting her strength.

"Wait a second mate, why _were _you alone with my little sister?" Ron asked defensively.

"Well, uh we…"

"We were off looking for you and 'Mione. We got as far as the Quidditch pitch," Ginny said wryly.

At that Ron and Hermione blushed and dropped the topic. Then the four sat in awkward silence for a few minutes. Madam Pomfrey then bustled in and shooed out Hermione, Ron, and Harry. Ginny felt a bit relieved at that point. She was still worried about the interrogation she would surely receive from Madam Pomfrey. And sure enough she received a tirade of questions.

"Miss Weasley have you had proper hydration the past few days? What have you had to eat? What have you had to drink? Are you studying too hard? I swear these students just overstress themselves…"

"Madam Pomfrey, I'm fine I promise."

"Fine? Do you call passing out in the middle of a lovely Saturday afternoon fine? Clearly there's something amiss here. I don't know what the problem is though. Here, have this," said Madam Pomfrey as she thrust a goblet of Pumpkin juice and a bar of chocolate at Ginny.

Ginny could not help but grow terrified at the sight of what was shoved in front of her. It was too much. Too much imperfection. Too many calories. Too much fat. Just _too much_. "Madam Pomfrey, I'm afraid I will feel worse if I eat anything."

"Nonsense girl, eat it and drink the goblet and you are free to go and enjoy your Saturday." Madam Pomfrey sat in silence and waited for Ginny to eat her chocolate. "It's not going to bite you dearie, that's your job."

"Oh, right," replied Ginny meekly. Ginny then delicately picked up the thing she abhorred most. As she put it in her mouth she felt repulsed because she enjoyed its taste. She ate it slowly and made sure to chew multiple times before swallowing and she quickly washed it down with the tankard of Pumpkin Juice. "Thanks Madam Pomfrey have a nice day," Ginny said as she rushed out the door.

Ginny sprinted as fast as she could to the closest lavatory. She quickly checked it out, good no one was around. She then rushed to a toilet and jabbed her finger forcefully down her throat and waited for the bile to rise. She then revisited the grotesque chocolate bar and pumpkin juice. She revisited it four times. When she finally felt as pure as she would get she flushed the toilet and wiped her mouth. She then looked in the mirror and wiped her eyes. She also did a quick breath-refreshing spell before she strolled out the door feeling accomplished.

She walked into a plethora of Hogwarts students on their way back from Dinner. "Oh good, I missed it," Ginny thought. She then merged herself in with the crowd of students. Ginny made her way up to the Gryffindor common room without much fuss. Neville then greeted her.

"Uh, hello there Ginny. F-f-feeling better now?" Neville inquired.

"Oh yes I'm just dandy now, I was a bit dehydrated that's all," Ginny lied. _Dandy? Who says Dandy? _ Ginny thought.

"I'm glad, well, um, see ya later then," Neville stuttered as he shuffled off. How cute.

Hermione, Ron, and Harry then encountered Ginny. She answered before they could even ask.

"I was a bit dehydrated. I just have to drink more water and I'll be fine."

"Good good, I'm glad you're fine. And I'm glad Harry here was with you when you fainted," Ron said begrudgingly with an obviously forced smile.

"Well, I've had quite a day I'm going off to bed everyone, nighty night," said Ginny feigning sleepiness. Everyone gave her a goodnight and she went up to her room. Ginny had not planned on instantly going to bed. She wanted to look through an American Muggle Magazine called _Vogue_ because the women were very thin. But she was too tired for that nonsense. She changed into her pajamas and curled up tightly in her various comforters and fell fast asleep at 9:00 on a Saturday night.

_A/N: Anti-climactic chapter ending. I know. I hope it's still okay though!_

_Thanks to all who have reviewed!_

_Ilovetom88-Thanks so much! I'm flattered you used the word _awesome_!!! I'm definitely going to keep going. _

HAPPY NEW YEAR! Be safe and take care of yourselves :-D

--Jayne--


	5. Lake Reflections

_A/N: I'm not J.K.R. Duh, don't own it or anything of the sort. _

_Check for comments at the bottom!_

Ginny woke up early on Sunday morning with a beam of light falling across velvet blanket. She shivered and hastily put on sweat pants and a sweatshirt. She decided that since it was so early, probably around 7:15, she would go out. She walked out of the heavy castle doors and was greeted by dazzling sunlight. She blinked rapidly and adjusted her eyes. She slowly walked towards the lake and decided to make her rounds.

Ginny started to run. She started quickly but soon realized that would not last and slowed her pace. As she jogged around the lake she began to think. _Why do I do this? Why is perfection more important to me now than this time last year? _Hmmm…

"_Ginny Weasley! You will never fit into those jeans so stop trying!" _Fucking Lavender, what does she know? _"Well, well, well, Weaslette if I _wanted _to get into your pants I couldn't, I don't think there's room." _ Damn Malfoy. But the killer was… Harry. _"Ron, did you _see _Cho today? She looked amazing." "Yah, I saw her, but she's your girl can't say much, but I will say this, she is the thinnest, tannest, and sleekest girl in Hogwarts. You lucky dog," said Ron._

Was that really it though? Probably not, Ginny did not even know what had spurned all of this, but she was thankful. It had made her recognize how imperfect she was and that she needed to change. She finished her fourth lap and looked at her watch. _9:00. _Shit, people were going to be waking up, she had to get back. Ginny ran back to the Gryffindor tower and showered. Then before getting dressed she sucked in and weighed herself.

_Weight: 115 lbs. (_doing better

_Food: None, it is reserved for the fat and weak._

I purged four times yesterday after an unfortunate visit in the hospital. Thank goodness dear Harry caught me after I fainted…

Ew. She was sounding all romantic and that was not Ginny. She had not time for romance. She only had time to perfect herself and do her schoolwork. Well, maybe she could make time for romance. It's not like she would ever need to though. She was too fat, ugly, stupid, and self-absorbed for a relationship.

Great 10:00. How was she supposed to waste the rest of her day and not eat? Library? _Please. _Quidditch pitch? _As if. _Maybe she could spend the rest of her day in her room. Probably not. But she figured there was something to do. After her run she was a bit tired. She decided to steal a quick nap since some people were still asleep anyway. Ginny then curled up and covered herself in blankets and tossed fitfully into a light sleep.

Sorry so short guys. I have school starting back tomorrow and I wanted to do at least one more chapter before I had to go back. Because that will consume a lot of time 

_Fehlerhaft- Thanks! I'm not going to neglect the story, I promise! I may be delayed in updates though. Fantastic? _Wow, _thanks!_

_Ilovetom88-Eeeee! You said awesome again! I'm very glad you think so!_

_Mysilentscream- Thank you very much! I'm glad you knew what I meant about problems with food, it's hard to explain. Lol. Thanks!_

_Hermioneballerina- Of course I'll keep going! Thank you! And of course… Happy New Year!_

_Angal10- Did I read that right? Did you call my story _out of this world?_ Jeeze, that's an awfully large compliment, thanks so much! It doesn't really take me too long to write, the problem is _finding _time. _

_Once again…school is in session tomorrow! BIG  I will continue to update as much as possible. But with Chemistry (Honor or CP depends on whether or not I got my schedule changed), AP US History, Spanish 3 Honors, and Creative Writing I won't have too much time! But please keep checking I will do my best to update! You guys are great! Happy New Year!_


	6. Those, uh, crazy muggles!

_A/N: I am not J.K.R. and I don't own these characters…imagine that._

_Comments at bottom _and _a little personal story._

Ginny stepped on her scale and anxiously awaited the three little numbers, oh how she wished it was two! Weight: 170 lbs. What? What was going on? This couldn't be happening! She looked down at her body, fat. Fatter than before, there was no way that was possible. She pinched herself…

…and awoke with a start. _Oh thank God, thank God, thank God! It was only a dream. I'm not _that _fat. I still am fat though, and I always will be. _ le sigh That's life. Right? No, it didn't have to be. If you work hard enough then you never know the outcome, so maybe, just maybe, Ginny could lose some more of that pesky weight.

Ginny looked at her watch, a Christmas present from Harry, to see how long she had slept. _1:00 PM._ About three hours, that was a fair sized nap. Great, she had missed lunch! Ginny was feeling ecstatic at this point and practically whistled as she jumped out of bed and threw her clothes on. She ambled down to the common room and to her surprise found Harry, Ron, and Hermione.

The thing Ginny hated about the trio was she could never tell if she was wanted or not. Not until… "Ginny, want to come sit with us?" Harry asked.

Ginny grinned and walked to her favorite cushiony chair and curled up like a cat. She listened to their conversation she could jump in soon enough. "Well anyways, it's sickening yet fascinating all at once, odd how things are like that," said Hermione. What in the world, thought Ginny.

"I do not see _what _is wrong with loony muggles. I always knew girls were a bit touchy and quirky, but why would anyone do that?" questioned Harry.

"I don't know mate, but I love food too much for any of that monkey business!" exclaimed Ron.

Ginny winced at her brother's words inwardly but kept a serene surface. What in the world are we talking about, Ginny finally asked.

"Well Gin," started Harry, oh God she loved that nickname, "Hermione was telling us about this crazy thing that muggle girls, well mainly girls do for beauty."

"What waxing their eyebrows?" mused Ginny. She knew she was being completely irrelevant but she felt the need to lighten the mood. She got her desired result, some much needed laughter.

"No, we were talking about eating disorders. I remember them from my health classes back in Muggle School and all. They make no sense to me. One is called Bulimia Nervosa and the other is…" Hermione pondered for a second and had trouble drawing the name.

"Anorexia Nervosa," Ginny answered a bit too quickly.

"How did you know that?" asked Ron looking bewildered.

"Common knowledge older bro," Ginny giggled back as her insides churned with embarrassment. "Listen, I think I have an essay to write, so I'm going to hop to that."

With that Ginny left as Hermione, Ron, and Harry looked at each other in awe. Either Ginny was quite intelligent, which she was of course (but about muggle things?), or she knew too much. Well, they all knew Ginny was a smart one, so Harry and Ron dropped the matter. Hermione lingered on the thought further but shook it off as they went on to discuss Quidditch.

That's all for now. Sorry it isn't so great, I've been busy and I really wanted to give you guys an update. Well, life is crazy. School sucks (just to let you know I'm in Honors Chem. now instead of CP). I got in a wreck on Thursday. I slammed on my brakes but the road was slick from rain and I smacked into the other car. She was all right, I was all right, my car on the other hand…will be all right in about…$3500. Sucks much. But she was so nice, I felt bad for hitting her!!! On to comments!

_Ilovetom88-Such a faithful reviewer! Thanks! I love to see you say awesome, that makes me feel way cooler than I really am._

_HermioneBallerina- Another great and faithful reviewer! Nah, you're not being selfish, I am always craving updates too! Thanks, and good luck in school._

_UnheardScreams- Amazing? turns a fierce shade of red Thanks much. No, I do not have an eating disorder, but I have my problems with eating and all, but no _real _disorder. _

_Thanks guys and have an absolutely awesome week! Hope everyone is having fun at school (or at least doing well). Don't get in a wreck and drive safely everybody._

_ 3-Jayne_


	7. Long Talks and Essays

_A/n: I have a surprise for y'all! I am in fact, _not _J.K.R. nor do I own the characters! Crazy right?!_

_Comments at bottom as always._

Ginny ran up the stairs hyperventilating as she replayed the conversation in her head. Why they hell would they be discussing eating disorders? _Think Gin think! _ Muggle Studies…muggle foods and nutrition! Of course, eating disorders mixed in with that, it made sense now. She hoped she had not made an ass of herself. What did it matter anyway? It's not like she actually had an eating disorder or something, the thought!

To avoid interaction with humans for a bit Ginny began to tidy her room. She straightened her desk, now studying would be easier. Made her bed, she never quite understood what the point of that was; you're just going to mess it up anyway. She reached under her bed and retrieved a tattered box. She gingerly pried the top off and lifted out the contents. Letters, pictures, report cards, you name it, if it was of importance it was probably there. The letter were, of course, from her Mum and all her ex-boyfriends, good thing Ron never saw those. Good, actually quite impressive report cards that reflected Ginny's capability and capacity for witchcraft. And the pictures. Pictures of her as a wee one, she was so cute. Then the pictures progressed. Three years old, kindergarten, primary school, then Hogwarts pictures appeared. First year, at the beginning she looked bright, fresh, and cute, by the end of the year, for obvious reasons, she looked dull, withered, gray, and troubled. As the pictures went on Ginny noticed a trend. She looked bigger in all of them, every single picture…bigger than the last. She had to change this.

Right then Ginny decided to use these pictures to inspire her. Thinspiration, yes that's what they were. They inspired her to not ever look like that again, no matter what. Then a picture of her at her biggest, she could hardly bring herself to view it. 131 pounds. Ew, it was disturbing, sickening, disgusting, etc. Never, ever again. At that she jumped up and weighed herself. 114.5, only half a pound difference from earlier. An improvement is an improvement she guessed. She then had to figure out more ways to waste her Saturday.

Ginny bravely ventured downstairs to the common room, again. This time she was armed with her books and was ready to do Snape's essay. To her relief no one was hanging around. She plopped down in her favorite chair and began to pour over potions and remedies. Then she wrote an essay she was quite proud of. At that point Ron, Harry, and Hermione walked in. "Ginny," started Harry, "where were you at dinner? We were worried."

She had missed dinner? Wicked. "Dinner is already over?" asked Ginny. "Well, I was working on Snape's essay. I guess I lost track of time."

"Do you want us to get you anything from the kitchens?" asked Ron. "You know Dobby will do anything for Harry here."

Hermione glared intensely at Ron, who began to look a bit sheepish.

Ginny broke the awkward moment, "I had some food stashed in my room, and I ate it about an hour ago. I'm good though, thanks!"

"Oh, alright," replied Harry. He looked at Ginny longingly for a moment and took the seat next to her. That earned a look from Ron, but he just took a chair and hoped that Hermione would sit next to him, which she did.

They all talked and talked. School, students, teachers, clothes, music, good and evil, life, and love, nothing was taboo. Ginny loved it. People leaked through the common room, but never lingered for long. The foursome was glad; they enjoyed being in their own little world. Times like these made Ginny forget her problems, all of them. Well almost. Food would occasionally enter her thoughts, but she would temporarily push the thoughts out. She lived for nights like this. Friends, laughs, and freedom from the things that constantly consumed her. But things have to end; at about 2:00 AM everyone was too tired to carry on a coherent conversation. As they headed up to bed Ginny was grateful for friends like those. Not many things could make her forget her obsessions.

Ginny lay in her bed and began shivering. Why was it so bloody cold? She curled up in a ball and tried to make warmth. Her legs felt so big, it was sickening. Why was she cursed with a body like this? What had she done to deserve this obsession? But in a sense, she felt lucky. Some people stroll around oblivious to their imperfections. But Ginny, she knew that she was fat. She was glad that she had this obsession that caused her pain, because with it she inched closer to perfection constantly. With the mixed thoughts that clouded her head Ginny fell fitfully into sleep, forgetting about the delightful conversation she'd had with Ron, Harry, and Hermione.

A/N: Hey all! Sorry it has been so long. School is a bitch, junior year is a tough one. I got my car back a week ago, rejoice! On to the comments…

_Mysilentscream: Thanks, actually I didn't hit a lady, I hit a girl who is a grade younger…Oops. Bless her heart. I'm doing my best with updates, so just keep checking! Thank you so much!_

_UnheardScreams- I'm glad to know it's realistic, I was worried about that. I have inspire you? Wow, thanks, that means a lot. Didn't know I was capable of inspiration._

_Ilovetom88- I know it was short, but at least you don't complain . Well, here's your next dosage, I hope it's okay! Thanks!_

_HermioneBallerina- Thanks! See…new chappie, yay! _

_Thank you all for being loyal reviewers, it serves as exceptional motivation to continue my story! If you want to(you know, not a suggestion here or anything…) you could add me to your fav. Stories or authors list. I would feel so very loved, but only if you want. Now that I'm done begging, have a lovely day all! I'm going to go play in the snow. (Actually I'm not, I don't like playing in the snow b/c it is so cold)_

_ 3-Jayne _


	8. Crunches and Cavortingokay more crunches...

_A/N: I am _still _not J.K.R. Too bad for me, I'd be filthy rich. le sigh _

_Comments at the bottom, God I haven't done this in tooooo long._

Ginny awoke from her sleepless dreaming. Or was it her dreamless sleep? She didn't even know anymore, she was just too tired of it all to care. _4:47. _God it was early, or late depending on your point of view. Ginny just wasn't a morning person though, and everyone knew that. So, what was she going to do at 4:47 in the morning? That was simple. Do crunches, push-ups, lunges, or anything of that nature. Isn't that what everyone does at 4:47 in the morning, well if they're not sleeping that is?

_316, 317, 318, _it was getting more difficult to constantly sit up for Ginny. She was so weak that it took colossal amounts of effort. Weak, that's all Ginny ever had been. She was too weak to resist Voldemort. She was too weak to put down that extra serving of food. She was too weak to wake up and go running. She was too weak to do anything that could improve her. Not anymore. That was the old Ginny; the new Ginny could overcome the weakness, the hunger. _319, 320, 321…_

By 7:15 she had no energy. She was accomplished though. She had managed 500 crunches, 200 push-ups, 300 lunges, and a shower. She felt very accomplished indeed, but she needed a nap. How convenient that it was Breakfast. Ginny was just the master, plain and simple. With that thought, she fell into a light, but much needed sleep.

"Ginny…Ginny! Wake up sleepy! You've gone and missed Breakfast again," shouted a familiar voice. Oh, it was Hermione. Only girls could up the steps to the girls' side, so that would make a bit more sense than Harry or Ron. "Ginny, did you hear me? Get up! We've got a Hogsmeade trip today!"

Ginny quickly jumped out of bed. "Oh bugger! I'd forgotten, thanks for waking me up Herm!" Ginny frantically ran around and picked up her favorite jumper, and several layers to keep warm. Hermione was gone so Ginny quickly weighed herself. _113.5 lbs. _Down a pound; well that was pretty decent progress. She wrapped herself up in her layers over the jumper, which now hung loosely on her bony body. She bounded down the steps and saw Harry waiting for her. Alone. Score.

"Hey Harry, I'd completely forgotten it was Hogsmeade weekend! Hermione woke me up, I'm always oversleeping," said Ginny. Man, she was rambling, but she just wanted some conversation out of quiet Harry. Maybe her rambling was annoying, because Harry certainly wasn't smiling at her like he should have been. He wasn't even laughing at her, which would've been an improvement over his stony expression. Which was beginning to scare her. "Harry, what's up?"

"Ginny, I'm worried about you." Ginny frowned and was ready to say something but Harry interjected, "You just don't seem yourself. And not to insult you, but you've just looked exhausted lately, absolutely burnt out. I think you need to have some fun. So Ginny, will you go to Hogsmeade with me?"

As if that wasn't obvious. Ginny's face broke into a grin, "Of course I will Harry, it sounds exactly like what I need right now." With that she took his hand, giggling, and began running to the Fat Lady's portrait.

"Wait Gin, one more thing," Harry said. She looked at him with her beautiful doe eyes, which suddenly didn't seem as hollow, and he leaned in and kissed her sweetly. Then _he _broke into a grin and led her out the portrait and towards Hogsmeade.

Ginny quietly went into her room after Hogsmeade to replay the trip. She mainly remembered the portion that was spent at The Three Broomsticks. She shivered at the thought of it, mainly because she had a butterbeer. Oh, the calories, the fat, the carbs. How could she have done that too herself? But she had to remember; it was only a drink, which would go through the body quicker than, another shiver, _food. _She couldn't remember when she had eaten last, and she liked that. Maybe even loved it. It was a delicious, no pun intended, thought.

_114 lbs. _Ginny quickly convinced herself that the drink did most of that. Even though she hated placing blame. She had to just ease up every once and awhile and realize that she couldn't live without hydration. But next time, it would be water.

A few crunches later Ginny passed out on her bed. Well, passing out on the bed would imply she fell asleep right on top of it, right away. So, she technically did not pass out on the bed. She put on flannel pyjamas, several layers of blanket, and shivered for a few minutes before she fell asleep. That was the Ginny way of passing out on the bed.

_Sorry it's been so long for an update guys, I've been rather slack. And super busy._

_Mysilentscream- Thanks for the input about the thinspiration. I really do listen to my reviews  And I'm glad you can understand that junior year sucks big ones. Thank you!_

_Unheard Screams- You _live _for my updates? Surely not! blushes You're too kind. Thank you!_

_Leogal- Well, it's a bit more than a _day _in the life of… And it's just OK? Well, I've yet to have a negative review, so I guess I needed to be brought back down. Thanks!_

_Strawberrysherry09- Thank you dear! I'll do my best to keep it up!_

_Angal10- OCSAR? Out of Character something? Maybe? But thank you very very very much! Thanks for such a lovely review!_

_Gonzy Rocks Blisters- Your username is random, I like it. You _definitely _just put more thought into my story than I have recently. I know it's a control thing, but that's difficult for me, b/c I'm not OCD or controlling or anything. I'm doing my best! Thanks!_

_Psychoblondebitch- I was scared to read your review when I saw your username, lol. But thank you it was a nice one!_

_Oh, and to everyone…This def. isn't my best chapter and I'm very sorry! Hopefully the next one will be better! So please, don't abandon my story forever b/c of a crappy chapter!_

_Love, me._


	9. Late Night Realizations and Frigid Conve...

_A/N: Thanks for waiting and being loyal guys! Thanks for the lovely reviews, comments at the bottom. Oh, and I'm _still _not JKR, le sigh some people have all the luck._

Ginny ran into Snape's class late, which was bad enough to begin with. Then Snape asked with his cold voice, "Your essay Miss Weasley?" She didn't have it. What was she going to do?

Ginny awoke with a start. A nightmare, thank God. She had forgotten entirely about all this school business. She could not recall an essay for Snape, but she had one for somebody. Flitwick! He usually did not assign essays but there was one due soon… today! Panicking she grabbed her parchment and quill and ran down to the common room. It was empty, well it was 2:37 AM, what did she expect?

Charms had always been her favorite class and she had excelled in it. She also knew that Flitwick revered her as on of his most exceptional students, what would he think if he knew about this? Where had her head been lately?

She knew good and well where it had been. Either in the toilet or avoiding food. Ginny refused to give up her perfection quest, but she had to remember that there were other important things too. Nothing of course would ever replace her striving for purity of physique, but she would get kicked out of Hogwarts if she didn't keep her grades up! She had to stay in control. Not only in control of her body, but of her mind, her spirit, and her class. She had been top of her class since second year, how could she let that slip up?

At about 5:57 Ginny finished up that monstrous essay and was beyond satisfied with herself. She would surely receive an outstanding note on that masterpiece. She was exhausted but felt motivated to do something for herself now. She pondered whether to run, do crunches, or something like that. While staring at the fire, she felt someone place a blanket on her. She jerked her head up to stare at whoever did it. Harry.

"You looked frozen, so I brought you a blanket."

"Um, thanks Harry. Why are you up so early?"

"I couldn't sleep well Gin. I was kind of worried last night when I went to sleep and all."

"Oh, is it Lord – "

"No, not him. I was worrying about someone very dear to me."

"Do you mind me asking who it was?"

"Well Gin, it was, it was you."

"What? Why Harry? Why do you need to worry about me?"

"You've just seemed so… off-color lately. And I don't mean this as an insult Gin but you look sick. I don't know what's wrong with you. You hardly eat, apparently you have trouble sleeping, and you're rushing your homework. This isn't you. I mean you must be terribly stressed or something, it even appears that your hair is falling out. You don't need that kind of stress. Is it too many classes? Someone bothering you? I'll take care of them, I mean if you want. Just tell me what is wrong Ginny, please."

Ginny couldn't believe that Harry just spoke that much, to her. And about her…state. She was suddenly angry with him though. Why was this his business and she didn't look sick! She was getting closer and closer to beautiful. What did he know? "Harry, I just don't see where you get off being all high and mighty here trying to help me. You keep all your problems to yourself but suddenly you feel the need to take on other's problems? I'm just peachy Harry, I don't need your help." She paused for a moment and said, "well actually I do. If you could just mind your own business and try not to be my therapist I'd be doing much better, thanks though."

Harry sat awestruck, staring at her with his beautiful green eyes. Those eyes looked so confused, full of pain, anger, confusion, and desire to help. Why had she not asked for help? He had offered, she had not even brought up the matter. But no, she had to blow up at him when he selflessly offered his assistance in her struggle.

Instead of leaving, as expected, Harry sat there. "You don't veil your problems well Ginny. In fact I didn't think you had a problem until just now, I thought you were sick. But after that blow up, it's like you're trying to conceal a problem. I'm still here, and this is my last effort to help you. Take my assistance or not."

"Alright, I didn't have to blow up. I'm just menstrual, okay? Don't worry about me."

Harry looked slightly uncomfortable, mumbled a sorry, and went back to his room. Ginny was quite proud of herself at the time. She fended off help with a great excuse. Menstrual? Please! She had not received her period in at least three months, it was fabulous too.

Feeling accomplished Ginny trekked up the stairs and into the bathroom. She stripped down and stepped gingerly on the scale desiring a smaller number than the time before. _113 lbs. _ She had been continuously making progress without looking back and she was quite proud of this accomplishment.

How long would it last though? She knew she had to eat _sometime_. Or did she? She was strong. Who says you can't survive on water alone? That would be good enough sustenance for her. Or at least she hoped so.

_Comments for all!_

_Thanks for reading and reviewing my lovelies! Here ya go!_

_Unheard Screams- That's neat that you relate to Ginny (my version). Well, not really, I hope that if you have a problem you're hoping to overcome it. She'll eat soon enough, I promise. Thanks for the review!_

_Leogal- Yay for pasta! Yeah, I know the last chap. was short, and probably wasn't even decent. Thanks! _

_My Silent Scream- There was three "great"s in there. It made me feel uber awesome. Thanks! Oh, and I'm glad you like the comments at the end, b/c whenever I read stories it used to bug me. But now I can't imagine not doing it, because I really do appreciate any comments that I receive, I feel so loved! So in short, anytime because you guys really are appreciated._

_Psychoblondebitch- Thanks; I'm really glad you're enjoying it! I'll try to make the updates a little bit more frequent! _

_Gonzy Rocks Blisters- Thank you! They are a thing, but they're not, all at once. Do you not like those two together? Sorry if you don't _

_Girlie- Look I updated! I'm working on doing more updates; I've been kind of lazy, sorry about that!_

_Lizagirl- I don't know if I deserve the term "amazing" here. Thank you very much though, it makes me feel important or something  and I'm on your favorites? Wow, you're just too cool. Thanks for the glowing review :-D! I'll keep on keeping on._


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